How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?

I get the feeling I'm never going to get an adequate chance with her. There is always something or someone who makes things more difficult. Hell, it's not even that. There's not enough patience in the world. Everybody wants things now, now, now. It will be nearly impossible for us to stay together long enough to find if we are truly incompatible. I have a feeling that we would be fine together if we could just live together... See each other every day and have physical/verbal communication without worrying about speed or money.
I think about this daunting task and I try to come up with a way to accomplish it. I am at a figurative roadblock, though. Every week, multiple times every week, she mentions her want to break up. Every time she does, I feel like I have no time. I can't do everything. I am not perfect. I can change, but not in an instant. It sounds a lot like even an instant wouldn't fast be fast enough. Sigh....
What does it mean when the only time I cry is when she says she wants to leave me? Does it mean I love her? Does it mean I'm obsessed? Does it mean I really enjoy her company? WHAT DOES IT MEAN!? If I'm obsessed, then somebody slap me. If I'm truly in love then why, as I have said many times before, its it not enough.
How does one define enough? If it's overall satisfaction, then we are doomed to fail. There is no way, ever, that I can compete with someone like me who lives closer. There is no way ever I can compete with every different type of person. I will lose sometimes. I had hoped that I was good enough, that I am good enough, to inspire her to take the chance and be with me. I do the best I can. I try to be nice. I try to be as good a person as possible.... But apparently, sometimes one's best still isn't enough.
So in light of all this pessimism from my point of view, I try to think of whats best for her. I know she's stressed. I know the distance doesn't help that. I know I can't do everything she'd like me to and I know I get on her nerves sometimes. I'm only human. I try to think of how she'd be happiest. Wonder about things like sleeping. It's not impossible, but I she does seem to go to bed|sleep? more readily after talking with me. I wish I could actually stay up as late as she does. It would make that aspect better... BUT! That's not what I was talking about. Right. Her sleeping. Actually, this works for a lot of things... I... Think this deserves it's own line:

I don't know how I would justify the things I do for her if we weren't together.

What am I supposed to do? Tell my parents I'm taking many many hours out of my day, spending money I don't have, to go see a friend 30 miles away? When I don't even go see my friends that live within two miles? Tell them I'm spending $30+ every month on my cell phone in order to talk to a friend? Explain that I am staying up all night with that same friend because she can't sleep? I mean, I know this is exaggerating, but I'm serious. If she's not that "significant" an "other", then she's just an "other." Not significant enough, in the eyes of some, to warrant the allocation of that large a chunk of my life to.
How do I say something along the lines of, "You are free to leave me if it will make you happy, if you really want, if you think it's best... But please don't," without it sounding clingy? The answer, definitely, is not three.